Well, it looks like I’ve been seriously slacking on my blogging. I’ve also been slacking on my journaling, which I’ve promised myself that I would do every day starting the 1st of the year. I made it two days on that.
Things have been very hectic in the Masterson household, what with my due date being just around the corner (February 15!). We have been making final preparations to Liam’s nursery, making sure all of his clothing and toys have been washed, attending birthing classes….. Just an endless list of all of the things that come along with planning for a baby.
In the midst of all of the planning and prepping, I catch myself constantly wondering when he’ll get here. I’ve said it a thousand times out-loud, in texts to family and friends and on Facebook that I would like to keep him in as long as possible. I REALLY don’t want him to come early. At the same time though, not knowing exactly when something is going to happen really sets my anxiety off. I also find myself wondering….. what will he look like? What will he be like?
Ryan and I picture him like this: Blonde hair, blue eyes…. But that’s about it. Will he have Ryan’s smile and my nose? Will he have my eyes? Will his hair be curly like Ryan’s or straight like mine?
There are so many unknowns when it comes to having a baby and it’s terrifying because I constantly live in fear of the unknown. I think that’s why I wasn’t really nervous about our wedding. Yes we had some bumps along the way the day of, but I knew exactly when and what time it was happening. I knew who all was going to be involved. There were very few unknown factors.
I promise I will try to get better at updating, although I know that over the next few weeks things will be a little bit insane so who knows if I’ll be able to follow through.